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And another thing.

September 5, 2010

I know, I know, where was I, gasp shudder, Saturday’s post was missing. I got a job, sort of. Yesterday I was at a meeting where they were  telling me that I didn’t get the job I wanted, but they’d like me for a another job.This job may or may not open a new doorway for me to sashay  on through.  But until its official I can’t spill the beans and franks. Confused yet? Mmhmm

In addition from another source…….Find me duly  informed that I need to get serious about my blogging. It seems I am too sarcastic and sporadic and un-committed. This may or may not be true and may or may not be corrected. One can only hold it together without whipping out a zinger for so long, and I am short on time and long winded.  Originally I started this blog as an adjunct to my Head, Heart and Hands group. It was meant to supplement our topics, share a little of my life, homemaking and Waldorf information. It appears that, as Mae West said, ” I used to be Snow-white but I drifted” man I love that woman, her and Dorothy Parker.  Ahem, Straight and narrow, buckle down, straighten-up and fly right. I have put my glad rags away stowed my overhead luggage. Did you know I was once a Flight Attendant? No???? Oh yes I was. “Would you care for feather, leather or fins, sir?”  We’ll talk about that another day though. Ohhh I should add, that the other night at one of our combine the families dinner, Sarah looked over her glass of wine and told me to show them the real stuff, don’t be so perfect. I cannot print how I replied.

You might think that with all the One Thing a Day clearing outs I have done, my home would be a pantheon to order. You would be wrong. Pockets of order, sure, just enough that I now feel disgusted with my utter slovenliness in other aspects of the home. Like baseboards that need to be painted, and wall divots to be filled, what to do with the 3 plastic boxes of photos pre digital camera? or the fine china we registered for at our wedding used exactly 3 times in 14 years ( yes mom I know), baby clothes from each girl, not all of them just a few special pieces, these weigh heavily on me and the garage shelves.  Do I need all those specialty baking pans just because they’re from  grandma’s bakery days? I only use them once or twice a year. I love looking at them stacked in the cupboard, she seems to be present when I use them, I can hear her saying my name and remember her soft hands showing me how to make pie crust. But do I need them? no, do they take up a ton of space? yes figuratively and literally. What about the dolls Coach’s mom, Nana made? She died unexpectedly in January and frankly my sister in law and I hoarded everything, “just in case”. My girls don’t want them. What to do, what to do? Will I ever really fit into those skinny pants or should I drive them to the Goodwill. Why must the dogs shed, how come no one else can see the toast crumbs all over the counter? Is it ok to be the mom who gives the parenting ed workshop  and then have people find out that its my girls  having a full-out screeching hair puling fight? Did my yelling at the girls damage them forever? This is what it is like to be in my brain. Chaotic and  busy. I have taken to writing down notes and leaving them on my desk to ponder later. This is a lovely idea if I could figure out what to what I was referring.

Back to the blog.  Balance, Rhythm, and Ritual. (I like threes) Major tenets that I suggest in workshops for living with children and creating a warm home life. At a first grade meeting last week a parent asked how my summer had been , I laughed and answered it spread out all over, I violated every best practice parenting or homemaking advice I’d ever given. It was a long lazy blob of a summer where we let it all hang out and it served it purpose. Through this summer’s lack of focus, clarity came in, in its sloth the need and place for order was seen, and with an ambiguity of  direction spaces for opportunity were provided. My intent is to find a balance between the daily chatter postings and sharing of information, to get a cohesive grip on this ungainly thing, and myself. Wonder if there is any chocolate around here????

One Thing a Day.

I took the day off.  Ok I took 3 days off.

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